She was a teenager. Living in an emotionally abusive home. Alcohol was often being consumed by her Father.
She told many adults, asking them for help. Some said she needed anxiety pills. Others said, there was no proof. Some looked at her with sad eyes.
The Father claimed he loved her, but was never present in her life. It sounded good, he lived her. He told stories, and people listened and filled him with sorrows. Those kind of sorrows which filled him with power to continuing destroying the little hope which was being left inside of her chest.
He was a master of lies.
Never before had he pictures framed of her.
He framed pictures and made sure people would see them. He really loves her, they thought, not knowing it was a scam.
She promised herself never to stay silent just to make him comfortable. If it so was the last thing she did!
Every year, am I incredible thankful and happy, for this gorgeous cherry tree. First I can enjoy the amazing flowers, then, the dark blood colored leaves, and top of that, juicy cherries.
What an amazing tree, and the beauty stands proudly in my garden. Many of the branches are hanging over the fence. People that passes stops and asks if they can taste. Of course, even the birds are welcome. There are plenty for all of us, every year.
“In the moment of fear, you can choose. You can always choose.
With calmness and stability you can think clearly. With clarity you can predict the storm, and its strength. By standing still, you can observe your own strength.” said the old Bosnian woman.
After the war had ended, I worked in Sarajevo, Bosnia Herzegovina on helping the growing numbers of homeless and sick animals.
Not much worked in the area, the elevator, and my flat was on eight floor. My stove had only one burner working, I had to wash my clothes in the bathtub. However, the heat in my apartment was on full speed. It was tropical-hot. In every home I visited, it was tremendously hot. No one wanted to freeze anymore.
Nearly every survivor said the same thing. “The worst feeling was freezing!”
One day I got sick with a high fever. The Bosnian woman, who had become like a mother to me, came up to my apartment on sniper alley. With her she had two beautiful bright yellow lemons, and some leaves with white flowers on. In my small kitchen she started to brew tea with her expensive lemons and handpicked flowers. She smelled the flowers and I saw her smile. In her face I could see the love and thankfulness towards the herbs. She handed me the cup telling me to drink slowly, to feel the strength returning back inside of me.
“When chaos is in the world you have to relearn how to live with Nature.”
One morning I realized while sitting drinking my morning coffee, that if my daughter or son, would be harmed in any possible way, I would fight for them.
I would be laud and direct, fighting for them to be heard and believed. — as I already have done in some ways— I would fight for their voice to be heard and justice to be made. Write about it. A matter of course!
But why in the name of …..did I not make myself heard? Or even fight for myself, in a more determined way?
I was shocked when I realized that I was quiet, hiding scared in a dark hole. Refusing to come up and fight, to be laud, set boundaries and say, “Enough is Enough!”
For two decades now had I fought for the Animal Rights. I was well known for rescuing many animals. And maybe also for my three published books. I could get the cruelest person to hand over their abused animal to me. In that case was I strong, and determined.
But how come I didn’t stand up for the person that needed the help most? I asked myself again!
Maybe it’s Because there are groups of different kind of help. You can be “lucky” to come to the right person right away, or, your road starts taking a scary turn, with the wrong people behind their desks.
We trust them. Listens to their promises. We trust their occupation, of course they must know what they are talking about. Right!
There are good people helping, but they are overloaded with work.
It doesn’t get easier because you finally dare to leave. Then the revenge starts.
Silence can make the wrong people continuing with their harmfulness. I started writing about this theme 1996, still not bigger of a change. More Women Shelter are being built. Good and sad.
It’s time to stand up, reunite with the past, starting today.
“Connection is the holly quality threads we animals has together. Have you ever thought why you humans still are depressed, even when you got everything around you? Food, roof over your head, a warm bed, a job, psychologists or other therapists!
You still feel lonely, disconnected from “something”, and you don’t know what!
You are disconnected from your spiritual you!
Many of you feel holly (connected) when together with either horses, or dogs (or other Animals) You feel loved, secured, you just are together in a connection that feels good.
The truth is, humans are more lonely today than ever before. You don’t have each other as you ones did. You need each other.
Everything breaths together. Heal each other as the Animals. We are a community, a group that breathes together.”